Most Hollywood movies and fairytales end when the two main characters become a couple after defeating the nefarious acts of the villain. A happily ever after is celebrated in a kiss or profession of love in marriage. The end. Sadly, real life is not as clear cut as the stories found in fiction books. The most challenging part in a real-world relationship is not in the getting together aspect, though it could be quite dramatic for some couples. It is in the middle everyday bits when nothing happens that can test the strength of a relationship.
Couples together for a long time will experience boredom eventually. The honeymoon phase is over as predictability and routine kicks in. Both partners don’t worry about the challenges and risks they initially experienced during the start of the relationship. At this point, everything becomes familiar. While stability is vital for a couple, it can also breed complacency and kill desire. Date nights are now typical dinners or Netflix sessions instead of being exciting and butterflies in the stomach events.
All is not lost when couples feel that their relationship is becoming a bit stale. Here are some ways they can do to ignite that spark again:
Be honest with each other
Nothing will change if no one does anything to break the routine. The first thing that couples should do is to be open about their feelings and listen to each other’s opinions. There should be no judgment and criticism in this conversation because mentioning that you’re bored might come off as blaming the other person’s lack of effort. One suggestion is to concentrate on what both people can do moving forward instead of dwelling on the past. Meanwhile, if one opts to keep those feelings inside, they can grow into resentment and dissatisfaction.
Start a project together
If every day looks the same, then it’s no surprise that couples will feel bored and stationary. Starting a project together can bring variety into the routine. It can also be something to look forward to, a kind of goal where both sides feel challenged to do their best. The project can be anything from working together with remodeling contractors for a brand new living room look to as simple as learning how to cook French dishes. The bottom line here is to incorporate new activities and experiences instead of going with the flow of daily life.
Recreate your first dates
People exert more effort in those first dates of the relationship because they’re still trying to impress their significant other. The puppy love drives action and excitement so that there won’t be an idle minute during the date. Recreating those fun dates can remind a couple of the happy memories they shared during that time. They might even resurrect feelings of romantic love again, highlighting the reason why both partners chose to commit to a relationship.
Try each other’s hobbies
While it’s healthy to give each other personal space to pursue their passion, couples can also benefit from trying each other’s hobbies. Getting a deeper look at what one’s partner loves can unearth what kind of person he or she is. It is also attractive to see that spark of joy and motivation when they talk about something with enthusiasm. On the other hand, having many separate hobbies can create an invisible wall between partners that can jeopardize intimacy and connection.
Experiencing boredom in a relationship is entirely reasonable. Couples can overcome this hurdle by talking to each other, starting a project together, recreate date nights, and participating in each other’s passion.
